Cinefile

Breaking up is hard. Twentysomethings who prefer to wing it as bachelors are largely motivated by this fact. Relationships can be great but when they don't work out--for whatever reason--the damage is irreversible. Significant others take a part of us when they leave our lives and for that reason we feel angry, cheated, sad or even dumbfounded that things turned out the way they did. In Daryl Wein's Breaking Upwards, the onscreen romantic couple is aware of the void caused by breaking up--so they decide to marginalize the pain by breaking up...slowly. Inspired by an actual experiment between Wein and his real life girlfriend Zoe Lister Jones--they also play the leads in the film--Breaking Upwards tells the story Daryl and Zoe's trial and errors at letting each other go. The experiment itself is gimmicky: the pair decide to "take days off" from each other during their last weeks together. This means they can see (or even sleep) with other people on their days off from being a real couple. At first, for Daryl and Zoe, the idea is mutely exciting; their relationship has grown a bit tired and this experiment represents a new chapter for their lives.

The first half of this film barely gets by as a compelling romantic drama or comedy because of this. We never really get a sense of a significant problem between the couple, so why should we be moved by this experimental break up? Daryl and Zoe play off each other comfortably but their dilemma hardly stimulates. It isn't until the meatier second half of the film that we begin to feel the weight of doom that is on the horizon for the pair. The fascinating development that arises has to do with the timing of each of their own pain. When their experiment starts, it almost feels harmless. But then they begin to notice shifts in their personalities and feelings--at different times. For example, when Zoe begins to warm up to her co-star (The Wire's Pablo Schreiber) in a new stage play she's in, Daryl finds himself surprisingly jealous. Then later, when Daryl sleeps with his employer he finds himself in a playful state of mind (a contrast to Zoe's remorse over meaningless sex with her co-star). The thing is that both Daryl and Zoe find that they end up wanting the other at exact moments of inconvenience for the other person. This is a common stasis in any struggling relationship, but here because of their situation, this ebb n' flow comes into stunningly clear focus and power.

So what begins as a lukewarm film, hurriedly matures into a seminal wake up call for struggling couples. By the last sections of the film, we feel a strong and important connection between Daryl and Zoe and its not created by their chemistry. In fact, it's because of the tangible sense of loss we feel for them by the final frame. An almost cliche sentiment that is always preached suggests that we don't know what we had until we've lost it. Breaking Upwards makes good use of that fundamental in perhaps the most unorthodox manner.

DVD Special Features:

Breaking Upwards is a classic example of inspired indie filmmaking. Why? Look no further than the Behind The Scenes Featurette which shows its microbudget production shoot. From a "company move" involving wheelchairs for mobile transport to their inexperienced boom operator also having to "slate" their takes (and this comes after they used their own hands as slates), Wein's film earns extra kudos for sharing its tribulations in principal photography. Also included is a Photo Gallery Tutorial, which shows how most of the cast and crew had to wear a lot of hats to get this puppy off the ground. A thing of beauty.